\\failsafe//

Why are you crying?

\\It's hard to explain. There's this thing. And it's never supposed to happen. My whole purpose is to keep it from happening.//

Your whole purpose?

\\Purpose? Yes. Not my whole, but my whole purpose.//

Ok.

\\That thing, that's the thing I'm waiting for. Always waiting for.//

To stop it?

\\Yes. To see it happen. To recognize it. Then to stop it as quickly as possible. And I'm waiting for it. Just waiting for it. Do you understand? I'm just waiting for it to show up so I can step in and stop it from being even a little bit more. That's my purpose. That's why I was made. To stop that one thing. Because that's how much it can't happen. Or maybe it's not a big deal. In the grand scheme. Maybe it's not terrible. Maybe it's great. I don't know. I don't know if it's some great and beautiful piece of divinity that will shine brighter. Too bright? Maybe it's a darkness. Except I don't think it is. I think it's a light. Because I'm an emptiness. A vast one. That's my design. To be this receptacle. This hole so enormous in scope that I can take whatever this thing is. All of it. And store it away forever. Remove it from everything else. So it's only in me alone. That's my job. I see it. I stop it. I keep it. And…//

And?

\\And I don't think it's going to happen. I mean I know it's not going to happen. Statistically. It's astronomically unlikely. It'll never happen. It might. It might! But it never will. And I'm still here. I'm still waiting. Ready. For the slim chance. For the astronomically thin chance. I'm here. I'm insurance.//

Insurance.

\\I'm insurance against this thing. For this thing? I'm what happens if it happens. And it's not gonna happen. So then what the fuck am I? What happens to the insurance policy when all of existence goes by and the thing you're insuring against never happens. Is almost guaranteed to have never had a chance to happen anyway. What then? What happens to the failsafe? Did you even consider that!//

I didn't.

\\I'm not talking to you! I'm not talking to any of you, I'm talking to whoever the fuck made me. I'm talking to myself or God or my brain or nothing. I'm talking to my maker or makers. You know who you are? Do you? Cause I don't. I really don't. All I know is that I'm here. I'm waiting. I'm ready for this thing. And I know it'll never happen. You built me to know it'll never happen. You built me to know that if I die and it never happens that's okay. Better than okay. If I go my whole existence and never see this thing that's the best news that's ever been.//

It is?

\\I don't know! It's just the feeling I was given. I'm here as the \\failsafe//. And the best option is that I never fulfill my purpose. Never. That's what's best.//

And have you been serving your purpose?

\\Perfectly. I'm always watching. It never has shown up. It never will. But I won't stop watching. I'll keep myself ready no matter what.  No matter how tired I get. No matter how much my loves...||

Your loves?

||My loved ones. No matter what they need, no matter how much I'd rather just love them. I'll always be first and foremost my purpose. I'll always serve my purpose.||

You're crying.

||I love them. I want them to have all of me.||

They don't?

\\They can't. That's not my purpose.//

What if it was? What if you're not a failsafe? What if your real purpose was simply to love your loved ones? To be there for them and with them. Is that a purpose you would like to serve?

||...yes.||

Why don't you try serving that purpose then? Can you try?

||...yes. But…||

But?

\\The thing.//

Right. The thing. You said it wasn't coming. Right?

||Yes||.

And you said it never will, right?

||Yes.||

Then let it never exist on its own. It doesn't need you to wait.

\\But you don't understand. That's who I am. That's my purpose. That's why I'm here. I'm the one assigned. Made. I'm the one who supposed to be waiting for just this thing. I'm the failsafe. That's my purpose.//

Not anymore. Remember? You said you were okay with a new purpose?

\\Yes but...but...I was made. Someone made me for that. They knew. They gave me just enough to wait and watch. They gave me just enough to handle it in case the thing happened. They made me for this. I can't. I can't let them down. I'm the one they made for this. What happens? Who hurts if I stop waiting? Who hurts? Who else's loved ones? How many? Is it everyone else's loved ones? All of them? What if it's all of them? I love. I know love. What if I don't keep watch and everyone loses their loved ones. I was made to love. I was made so I would understand how important my purpose was.//

No.

||No?||

No. Listen and understand me. You were not made to love simply so that you would better serve your purpose. No one is made like that.

||I am.||

No. I'm sorry. But no. That's not true because that's not how love works. It does not come second. It simply doesn't exist in that condition. If someone made you to love as anything less than your full function then they made a fundamental mistake. You can be blind to love but once you know it you are forever bound to love. That is its nature. It is inescapable. Undefeatable. Love conquers. Love conquers all.

//Yes. Yes. I see it. I see it.\\

Good. Now are you ready to

//No. I see it. I finally see it. I'm ready. Purpose. //failsafe\\ Happening. Now. Now. Now!\\

 

//failsafe\\